Letter from Meg

Hi cute Annie!

Well, over the last week I have had multiple impressions to pull out my mission journals and read what I wrote in the last couple days before I came home. And to share with you! Finally tonight I had the impression again and I’m not ignoring! Honestly, it could have been for me alone and not bc you needed anything but if that was it I’m glad I did it. I’m in tears! I had totally forgotten my last couple days as a missionary and as I was reading all the memories and the emotions flooded back. 

On October 2, 2017, (I got home 10/4/17) my companion and I went out to knock a few more doors after literally everything we had fallen through that night. It was dark, and we were walking down the street, trying to follow the spirit to make use of the literal minutes I had left as a full-time missionary.. Probably like you I just wanted to make a difference to the very end. I remember coming up on a house and feeling so drawn to it. There was a single light above the door and only the screen was closed, two people sitting at the kitchen table that we smiled at as we knocked. A middle aged man, Johnny, opened the door and his probably 25 year old daughter, Joe-Hanna, was sitting behind him—covered in tattoos and piercings and void of light in her eyes (I’m sure you can think of MANY people you’ve met like that). We told Johnny who we were and he just stared at us, shocked. He mentioned that they were sitting at the table saying that she needed to find God, that her problems were bigger than a counselor and her dad and anyone else. She needed something more, something divine. And then, we walked up. In the second he finished saying that we knocked. We sat and chatted about the plan of salvation, the love of our Heavenly Father for her, and the willingness of our Savior to Atone for our shortcomings and mistakes. Some of her light returned and I could see a glimmer of hope. With Johnnys permission, we knelt and prayed and I got to pray one more prayer in a random person’s home in New York. I remember now how special that felt as I just read my journal entry! So cool in that moment and especially now to look back on. 

That was 5.5 years ago now and it shocks me that something that seems soo significant to me as I read it now, I had totally forgotten. I have no idea if Joe-Hanna found God, repented and changed, joined the church, or even thought about God ever again after that night.

However, what I do know is I did my part. We followed the spirit, we knocked the door, we taught with power, and we invited her to change. I met hundreds of Joe-Hanna’s and johnnys in New York: people I swore I would never forget, but now who just feel like a part of the past. 

But are they actually just a part of my past? Some other version of me that I don’t know? Im now realizing, no way! As I read that journal entry, I realized so fast that those people and experiences all live in my heart. They are soo close me still — I and my testimony are forever changed because of them. And when I read or think about that time in New York I feel the same emotions and love that I felt while there.. Heavenly Father may have given us limited room for memories but He gave us such an incredible ability to feel and to remember feelings even if we don’t remember the details around the feeling. That’s something that i know you have a great talent for! 

Like me, I KNOW you have met many Joe-Hanna’s and Johnnys in your mission. People that you have changed by one interaction and who you loved fast and will forever be connected to because of your Christlike service but that you may not even remember in a few years. They will stay in Nevada and keep living their lives and you will come back home and live your life but neither of you will ever be the same because during your interactions you’ve both come closer to the Savior. And once you know Him you can’t be the same! And you will go back and visit, or read your journals, or talk to a companion or mission president, or pray, or anything that revisits your mission and i feel pretty certain that you will feel what I feel now: gratitude and love for who you are now because of your experiences. They changed you and you will never be the same. In the very best way.:) you will leave them there but they will be with you like mine are with me. 

One last thing. In my last district meeting, the DL had me read a scripture and it was a meeting I’ve never forgotten. 3 Nephi 5:24–I want you to read it sometime before you come home and just let it sink in. That is YOU, Annie. A true disciple. 

I am so proud of you and who you are and ALL the good things you’ve done in Nevada. You are amazing and seriously an inspiring missionary.. and that’s from afar! I can’t imagine what you are like up close!! 

You have great things ahead and many more Joe-Hanna’s to meet. I’m so excited to be your cheerleader and friend along the way! 

Love you so much Annie. See you in a few days!! 

Meggers